Lalley Walkabout 2011
An ordinary American middle-aged couple set out for a six month world wide walkabout, attempting to ignore their responsibilities for the first time in their lives...
Friday, June 24, 2011
Home again ...
"The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes." Marcel Proust
A few weeks early, we found ourselves traveling home to help Pat's family care for his mom, who was diagnosed with a brain mass and needed surgery and rehab care. Bernice is an amazing 90 year old mom, grandmother and great-grandmother who came through her surgery well and is receiving wonderful rehab care in Grand Rapids, Michigan. We are so grateful for the time we were able to spend with her, and to be honest we must have been ready to come home because we hadn't yet planned our Galapagos Islands adventure. It will have to wait for another time ...
So we've been thinking about how to put these five months in perspective, to sort through the images, experiences and relationships we have had so that we won't forget or lose sight of things. Which called to mind Proust's quote ... perhaps the best thing that happened over the past six months is that we have begun to look at the world differently. Whether in northern India seeing displaced Tibetans struggle to save their language and culture, or in Africa as children and their families struggle with poverty and illness and educational barriers but still retain their smiles and joyful dispositions, or in South America as committed and tireless citizens work to provide better lives for their communities, we see ourselves as connected and involved. We have been so blessed to have walked a while with these people, and we will hold them in our hearts forever.
We aren't really so different after all. Our countries look different, we look different, our language and customs and faiths may be different, but we all seek peace and joy in our lives, and we all love our children. In Grand Rapids, Michigan, Bernice was surrounded by her children and grandchildren as she faced this surgery, and a few days later welcomed her 15th great grandchild, Brady Haarman, into the family. And in so many parts of the world, generations work and live together in a life long struggle to thrive amid so many obstacles. Family, and the importance of connections between people, are the same the world over. If we understand that, how can we not live in peace?
So with these "new eyes", here are a few things we hope to see as we return to our lives in America:
- More possibility than worry in every day.
- Opportunities to simplify our life, so that we will have more to share with people in other parts of the world who ask for so little, but can really use the help.
- Valuing the connections that have made our life so meaningful by taking more time with friends.
- Continuing to trust that our adult children, who survived (possibly even thrived?) without us for six months don't need for us to waste energy worrying about them.
- Taking care of our bodies, and remembering that the carbs we crave don't have feelings and won't be hurt if we refuse to eat them. We have both lost about 25 pounds with eating less and walking several miles a day, and we feel better than we have in many years.
- Chances to thank our employers, patients and coworkers for allowing us to go "walkabout", because now we understand how really badly we needed the break.
- Ways to challenge, each and every day, the message brought to the American people that we are better off not caring about the world around us and isolating ourselves and our vast wealth rather than sharing our concern, compassion and abundance.
- Time to appreciate each other and the relationship we have together. After six months, it's nice to realize that we are both a bit sad to have to share each other with others again, and that we never had a day where we were sick and tired of each other's company. It is a wonderful thing to be married to your very best friend.
Who knows, maybe "walkabout" is also in how you see it. Maybe every day, when worry and anxiety and feeling overwhelmed and frustrated and over responsible start to creep up, we'll be able to sit back, take a deep breath, close our eyes and say "for the next five minutes I'm going walkabout to Zanzibar ..."
The Sacred Valley of the Incas ...
So the taxi arrived, and Pat said "Como se llama?", and the guy answers "My name is Achilles". What? Are you kidding me, as in the weak ankled Achilles? Off we went, with me muttering "This is not good". We drove off of the highway, through farm roads more stone than dirt, and about an hour into the drive Achilles pulled over and said "It'll be just a minute while I change the flat tire."
Pat didn't bother to tell me that the spare was not in the best condition, and I didn't bother to ask what we would do if we got another flat.
Achilles got us through the Sacred Valley where we saw a natural salt farm and some of the most spectacular mountains, valleys and Incan ruins
of our trip. We made the bus in time ...
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Cuzco and Macchu Pichu ...
We took the train from just outside of Cuzco to the city of Agua Caliente, at the entrance to the Macchu Pichu national park area. From there it is a 2 hour hike up the mountain to the "lost city of the Incas". It is amazing to see the Incan architecture and landscaping, with brilliant green grass under blue Peruvian skies. A beautiful walk there and back, and then took the train back to Cuzco.
Friday, June 3, 2011
Hola, Chimbote!
A few minutes later, a van pulled in and we loaded into it. The guy driving introduced himself as "Juan" and said he was in a hurry to get to mass; when we pulled into the church parking lot, he jumped out of the van in his full priestly garb and ran into the church to lead the service. It would prove to be a fitting welcome to the ways in which people working in Chimbote are always multitasking and collaborating to serve the people of this impoverished community.
Our Host Family ...
Father Jack Davis, an ordinary man doing extraordinary things ...
Dignity, respect, love and service ...
Sister Juanita and the Hospicio Team ...
The Hospice Team ...
When Deb and I first walked from the dusty street and through the gate into this hospice facility, we both felt the peace, tranquility, and comfort of the surroundings. A beautiful green space, flowers viewed from every patient room, a vegetable garden in back to provide nourishment, and many birds made it ideal for patients and families. The staff were welcoming, interested, caring, fun, and worked well together as a team. We split our time equally between inpatient and home visits. We also had the pleasure of working directly with Dr. Cinthia Bocanegra, the hospice physician. Cinthia was knowledgable, caring, interested in new ideas, and understanding in her explanations despite the language barrier.
Home visit with a sweet señora ...
It's hard to imagine how attached you can get to patients, families, and staff in just 2 weeks, but we did. Elizabeta was a 7 year old admitted with terminal lung cancer. Her young mother was in the room with her other child, a 16 day old infant, when we first met. Elizabeta had been diagnosed at age 2, and now was terminal after all treatments were not effective. Deb held the infant as we explained the situation to Mom and recommended pain medication for comfort. We revisited several times over the next two days meeting extended family and friends. Elizabeta was comfortable and asleep when she died on the second day, her little hand resting on the open bible and her head covered with a bright Peruvian hat.
Pedro and Juan ...
Juan had been at hospice for some time with pulmonary fibrosis. Unfortunately, his condition declined as expected and all appropriate treatments for his disease were being tried. We asked him about his goals and he stated he wanted to be comfortable and not struggle to breathe. We taught the staff about the use of morphine for shortness of breath and helped them transition and accept his wishes that he not go back to the hospital. When we were leaving he had declined further but thanked us for making him more comfortable and tranquil.
Roseta ...
This was true throughout our stay in Chimbote. The people we met were poor, but rich in love, spirit, and reaching out to us. A memory and lesson that will stay with us always.